lovenotfear Thoughts and inspiration for a happier you

If you are one of those people who suffer from what I call BMS (Blue Monday Syndrome), here are a few simple ways you can turn it around. It won’t happen overnight, but if you re-train your brain you can actually look forward to Mondays.

The first thing to ascertain is why you feel blue on Mondays.

It probably boils down to one of two scenarios.

NUMBER 1. You are not living / working / loving / being the way you want to.

The first is that what you do for a living, or what your week entails makes you unhappy. In other words, there are major changes to be made in your life before you will enjoy or look forward to Mondays. Do you hate your job? Is there anything else in your life that makes Mondays unbearable? If the answer is yes, then consider ways to change that thing. I’m not suggesting you resign or do anything drastic, but what can you do to make it more pleasant, enjoyable, aligned with your purpose and values? Even small shifts can make a difference. In this scenario you are probably enjoying weekends, because you can almost pretend things are good, and then Monday rolls around again and you are hit with reality and you feel miserable.
What big change do you need to make in your life? Start giving it some thought and take small steps in that direction.

Number 2. It’s just that Monday feeling…

The second scenario is preferable – this is when it’s not any particular thing that brings you down. Perhaps you actually like your job and/or your life and your Monday activities, it’s just a mindset habit you have formed over the years. Many people experience this and it’s largely a hangover from childhood, because of the way it used to feel on Sunday evenings when Carte Blanche was on and you had to make sure your home work was done – that dreaded Monday back-to-school after a carefree weekend feeling. If this is the case, you’re lucky, because the only changes that need to take place are in your mind.

Try these ideas!

1. What one thing can you change?
   What’s the thing that bugs you most on Mondays? Maybe it’s the school run or the stress of getting everyone out the door on time that gets your Mondays off to a bad start? What one thing can you do to improve the situation? Maybe it’s joining a lift club, changing your work start time or – if your kids are still doing their schooling online, sorting out a separate “office” for them.

2. How can you start your day with a positive wave?
   Maybe you begin to keep a Monday gratitude journal, where you write down all the things that are good and positive in your life. Perhaps it’s a matter of waking 15 minutes earlier and doing a few stretches and a meditation, taking a quick walk or reading something positive and uplifting.

3. Start a Positives-Only Monday Mindset.
   The idea is to try to focus ONLY on positive things on Mondays. From the time you open your eyes, think about, feel, read, write and listen to only uplifting positive things. What are you looking forward to? What are you grateful for? What makes your heart sing? Focus on those things. Yes, you still have to work, and drop the kids off and wax your legs, but find the joy, the gift, the silver lining in everything. You may start to see this attitude spill over into Tuesdays and Wednesdays and before you know it, life looks a little brighter all-round.

4. Prepare for Mondays.
   If you know your Mondays are likely to be blue, why not prepare in a way that automatically makes them better or easier? This could involve putting your clothes out on a Sunday night, so there’s one less thing to think about or asking your cleaning lady if she can come in on Mondays, if it’s the weekend mess that irks you. You could also prepare by making sure your work schedule is prepared and you know what the week looks like, so that you don’t start Mondays in a panic, trying to remember what’s going on and freaking out about how much there is to do.

5. Prepare emotionally too.
   If you know Mondays are blue, try to ensure any triggers are cleared (such as a dirty house or being unprepared for the work week ahead), and then end your Sunday night with a meditation, yoga or stretches, perhaps even coming up with a mantra you can say on Sunday night and Monday morning.

6. Make Monday the best day.
   Another way is to have some sort of reward or spoil for yourself on a Monday. Whether it’s a yoga class, ready-made meal to look forward to every Monday, or making Monday a night you watch your favourite show for an hour or two or give yourself a manicure and put on a facemask. Make Monday Treat Day!

Above all, bring your awareness to how you feel on a Monday. Awareness is always the first step, followed by making a choice to make a change.

5 simple techniques for reducing anxiety

If you’re someone who gets wrapped up into a tight little ball of nervous anxiety when you’re stressed and you don’t really do anything about it, I have a question…

If there was a way to be able to control that nervous energy and bring everything down a notch or seven, would you use it? Yes?

Good news, guys. There is a way. Several ways, actually. Tools you’ve heard of, read about. Maybe you’ve even tried a couple. But in my experience as a serial befriender and dater of anxious people, you guys seem to shun the very methods that could help the anxiety. It’s not your fault; after all, it’s the opposite of what your body naturally wants to do when you’re in a heightened state of anxiety. So, it’s not easy. But maybe, just maybe, you haven’t given them a proper try? What if something works?

What about now?

Studies have shown that anxiety has severe effects on the body and mind – both short-and long-term. The more serious of these is heart issues, gastrointestinal issues, heart problems like increase risk of heart disease, various illnesses from a lowered immune system, gastrointestinal disorders including irritable bowel syndrome, memory problems and frequent migraines.

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

1. Breathe

If you suffer even just a little bit from anxiety, you’ll know that your breathing can become quite shallow and quick when you feel out of sorts. By learning to control your breath, you can learn to control your anxiety. And if you learn to manage your anxiety – needless to say, you go into the next phase of your life a little bit calmer, able to deal with life’s ups and downs a little easier. Intentional breathing has a calming effect on the nervous system and the mind – it’s almost impossible not to feel better after a series of deep, slow, intentional breaths. There are a variety of methods to try – google and see what resonates with you. Better yet – watch this great TED talk and then find the method that works for you.

2. Meditation

Whether you lie on your bed listening to a guided meditation or try the “just sitting” method, it will help you. You will find that any instruction around meditation starts with deep breathing. (Funny that.) Once you master the art of stillness, you can use it any time to bring your anxiety level down. Any. Time. The major cause of anxiety is worry, and if you learn to “just breathe” and “just sit” and “just be”, you can learn to let go of worry, even if just for a few minutes at a time – at first.

3. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is simply the art of knowing what is happening, as it’s happening, without any judgement. It’s about being present in the moment. How might this help you? As you become more mindful, you can more quickly and easily notice when your anxiety levels go up, and you can then use one of the tools to calm yourself. This involves doing only one thing at a time, and for those who suffer from anxiety, it’s an invaluable way of being. By training your mind to focus on only one thing at a time, you learn to shut down all the incessant chatter in your head. If you’re eating, just eat. Don’t eat while working or while trying to come up with a solution to your problems. If you’re in a meeting, just be in the meeting – don’t start rehearsing what you’re going to say to the person who upset you most recently.

4. Mantras

I am lucky in that anxiety only hits me every now and then, but when I feel it rising in me, I do something about it immediately. If I have time, I will sit and breathe or meditate for a while. If I only have a few minutes to get back to good, I simply take a few deep breaths and I remind myself that everything is under control. I might need to do it a few times over the space of an hour, but the action I take ALWAYS helps. Always. Another mantra I use is NNTP, which of course stands for No Need To Panic. It makes me chuckle and that, friends, is yet another way to reduce your anxiety. Find something to laugh at.

5. Solve a problem

If you really have something causing you severe anxiety, ask yourself: What’s my main problem, really? If the problem is something quite real, and it is within your power to change it, then spend some dedicated time writing, thinking and/or talking about the problem, and find a workable and realistic solution to it. Of course, if it’s on your mind while you’re chasing a deadline or doing your work, then use one of the other tools to calm yourself. Decide right there and then on a time and place that you are going to actively work on a solution – whether for an hour or a morning. Put it in your diary if you have to. Then breathe, say your mantra, be mindful and remind yourself that there is no need to panic - you have set aside time to work on the solution and for now, worrying isn’t going to change anything.

I’m not saying it’s easy, and of course I’m not professing that people with major anxiety disorders should sniff lavender and do their “ohms” and all will be right in the world. But if it’s something that tends to get the better of you and you haven’t yet started intentionally working on your anxiety, why not give these simple (and super cheap) tools a try? You might find it’s a lot easier than you thought.

Most importantly though, it’s a conscious, intentional step in the direction of self-love and self-care. And that’s always a powerful thing. It might seem dramatic to say you could harm yourself, but you know deep down that your anxiety is doing you no good.

It’s quite a simple equation - if you want to see and feel an immediate improvement in your relationship, improve the way you (both) communicate.

Words have incredible power. We use them – sometimes in the most subtle ways - to bring our partners down, criticise them, make them feel a bit bad about themselves and other not-so-nice things. Here are 10 phrases you should stop saying immediately.

1. “Whatever.”
A timeless classic, “whatever” is used to dismiss what your person is saying (and feeling). It’s a firm favourite with those who have a passive aggressive style of communicating in a disagreement. When they start to feel angry or uncomfortable or like they’re backed into a corner, instead of facing the disagreement, expressing their emotions honestly and hearing what the other person is saying, they say “whatever” to summarily end the disagreement.

2. “Anyway…”
A bit more subtle, “anyway” is also dismissive. It implies that the conversation isn’t worth finishing, or that your or your partner’s thoughts, feelings etc., are not that important. It’s a verbal outward wave of the hand. It can sometimes work as a segue from the conversation you started but got too chicken to finish and the part where you move swiftly along to something more mundane:

“It’s just that you said you’d be here at 1. Anyway… have you decided what you want to order?” Stay with it. Finish the convo.

It can also be used in a self-effacing way – where you are almost managing to speak your truth about something, but then get scared or feel silly or something, so you say “anyway” to dismiss it and move on.

3. “Never mind”
Again, dismissive and disrespectful. It implies something like “you’ll never get it”, “it’s pointless”, “you’re stupid”. “I don’t care”, “you don’t care” and other such passive aggressive shitty things, without saying them.

4. “What’s wrong with you?”
This is rhetorical obviously, so not really a question - more of a statement. It says: “there is something very wrong with you.” It’s not nice. Don’t ever say this. Unless your dude has sold his car for cheap plastic inflatable flamingos that he hopes to sell on ebay. Then, you can say it. But if it’s because he eats meat, or said something inappropriate or missed the toilet, it’s not okay to say this. If you’re about to say this, ask yourself if you are making assumptions and being Judgy McJudgerson.

5. “You always…”
These sweeping blanket statements are never a good idea. Instead of saying “you always leave gooey stuff on the dishes when you wash them”, say: “hey babe, you’re a champ for washing the dishes, but I was thinking maybe you should wear your glasses when you do, because you sometimes don’t see some remnants, you sexy beast of a man”.
Instead of: “you’re always in a bad mood”, try: “you seem to be in a not-so-good space lately… is there anything I can do?”

6. “You never.”
Same as above. “You never bring me flowers anymore.” “You never get it.” “You never listen.” Stop. Take a breath. Think about what it is you feel is lacking, and without using the word “never”, ask for what you want. Instead of: “you never ask me how my day was”, say: “I would love it if once in a while you showed an interest in my day, what I did, or what’s going on. Do you think you could try to be a bit more mindful of that and a bit more curious about my day?”
How much more productive and constructive is that?

7. “It’s fine.” (when it’s not) and “I’m fine” (when you’re not)
It’s so easy sometimes to say everything’s cool, when deep down (or even not so deep down), you’re actually feeling quite pissed off. If it’s not fine, don’t say it is. If you’re not fine, don’t say you are. You are allowed to express anger or disappointment, but do so with kindness and in a way that builds, rather than breaks. Truth in a relationship is very attractive. It may not feel like lying lying, but saying it’s all good when that is not how you feel is an untruth. If you don’t want to talk about it right there and then, rather say: “I am feeling super weird and it’s hard to know right now what the feeling is, so I just don’t want to talk about it now.

8. “If you love me…”
Don’t even. Unless you’re totally joking. This is super manipulative and has no place in a relationship beyond the year 1989.

9. “Typical”
When you’re in an argument, and your partner says or does something you don’t like, and your response is “typical”, it implies so much, doesn’t it? It’s basically saying, well this is exactly the kind of thing you would say/do, because you’re essentially, at your core, an asshole (or a liar, or a scaredy cat or whatever). It’s a direct attack on the other person’s character. This other person being your person – the one you love more than anyone else on earth, remember?

10. “You’re funny.”
Nothing wrong with saying this if you have just had a laugh and you’re telling your person that you think they’re funny. The problem comes in when the statement is nothing to do with humour, and you’re using the word “funny” as a replacement word for something you can’t say. Like lazy, or selfish, or insensitive, or whatever it is you are feeling about your little honey bear in that moment. Rather say how you really feel, but in a kind and constructive way, and only after assessing its importance in that moment.

There once was a little grey, black and white bird
(the noisiest creature that you ever heard).
He lived in Lush Haven and his name was Tim,
and every two seconds, he chirped on a whim!

Now Timmy was funny and clever and cool,
but he never stopped twittering - not even at school!
He talked over his teachers and chatted in class,
and his non-stop chirping was a pain for the ass.

Nobody could ever hear themselves think -
not the pig or the cat or the slug or the fink.
No matter where or with whom, he just never quit…
Because Timmy was a talkative little tit!

Timmy missed out on all sorts of things;
the lessons at school, the cricket who sings.
“I’m having a party and I’d like you to attend!”
said Robbie, his red-breasted robin friend.
But Timmy was chattering away and he didn’t hear…
so he missed the cake, the fun and games, and the cheer!

He never listened to the babbling brook
or really heard the story, when his teacher read a book.
He missed out on wisdom and jokes and information,
because he never shut down his communication station!

But even more annoying than his constant chatter
was how he made others feel like they just didn’t matter…

He interrupted their stories every single time,
with a story of his own, or a chirp or a chime.
And he never asked questions about anyone else;
the talkative little tit only spoke about… himself.

One day Timmy’s friends planned a camping trip.
There was Cray-Cray and Robbie and slippery Slip,
and Sally the sparrow and Arnie and Paul,
Tom the cat and Ziggy and all!

“Shall we invite Timmy?” asked Sally the Sparrow.
“No”, said Arnie, “I’ll shoot straight as an arrow -
that bird talks one heck of a lot
and we want peace and quiet at our camping spot.”

“You’re right” said Slip, “let’sss not invite him.
Ssssometimes he’ssss so noisy, I jussst want to bite him!”

“Well alright then”, said Sally, “we’ll leave him behind…
Oh, I really hope he doesn’t mind!”

When Timmy flew by and saw they were packing,
he asked what they were doing, but his manners were lacking
so he didn’t wait for a single reply.
He just carried on chatting about what, when and why,
and so come the next morning when he went around to play,
nobody was home, not even Cray-Cray!

He saw Cray-Cray’s uncle, a crabby old bugger,
and said: “have you seen Cray-Cray or Sally or Slugger?”
“No”, said the crab, “I ain’t seen them at all,
nor Arnie or Tom or Ziggy or Paul”.

Timmy searched high and boy, he searched low,
but he just couldn’t find them - where did they go?

He saw Sally’s neighbour, who was a blind old bat.
“Do you know the whereabouts of Sally or Tom the cat?”

“They’re camping,” said the bat, “they seemed quite excited!
But don’t tell the tit - he wasn’t invited.
They wanted peace and quiet all weekend,
so they left behind their noisy little friend.”

Well Timmy was shocked, by what he had heard
and for the first time ever, he didn’t say a word.
He just flew away, quiet as could be,
across the meadow, past the old oak tree,
down to the orchard and up past the stream,
where he came across his uncle, Uncle Kareem.

“How are you my child?” asked the old bird,
and waited for the answer, but none was heard…
“Why so quiet, Timmy? It’s so unlike you…
Are you ill? Are you sick? Do you have the flu?”

“No” said Timmy, “I’m doing okay…
I just feel sad, because my friends went away.”

So Timmy told him all about the big trip,
with Sally and Slugger and Arnie and Slip,
and Ziggy and Cray-Cray and Tom and Paul,
and how they didn’t want to invite him along, at all.

His uncle listened and then said with a smile:
“Why don’t you perch quietly over here for a while?
You can stay and have some lunch with me –
I’ll make us a pot of Owl Grey tea!”

Timmy perched on the branch and kept quite still,
but he felt like he was swallowing a very bitter pill.
His beak began to quiver, he felt the rise of a tear,
but then a funny thing happened, he began to hear…

He heard the gentle breeze, rustling through the leaves,
and the sound of the weaver at work, as it weaves.

He heard little dogs barking, and young kids at play.
He heard a wolf howl, and a horse neigh!

He heard the cow that moos and the cricket that sings.
Oh, he heard all sorts of wonderful things!

When his Uncle returned with lunch on a tray,
Timmy ate, and sipped tea, with not much to say.
But when lunch was done and he felt good as new,
He turned to his Uncle and asked: “how are you?”

His uncle spoke about his health and his morning,
but then changed the subject and gave Timmy a warning.
“It’s important to listen, Timmy, my boy;
constant chatter does tend to annoy!
Learn to hear your teachers, family, and friends -
and maybe you’ll be invited on those camping weekends!”

“Thank you,” said Timmy, nodding his head.
“I listened to every word you said.
I’ll try to remember not to talk all the time,
or interrupt other creatures with a chirp or a chime!”

The next day his friends came back from the woods
with their tents and backpacks and other tiny camping goods.
And while they were unpacking, young Timmy flew by,
but instead of being noisy, he seemed a bit… shy.

“Did you have a good weekend?” was all that he said,
and then settled on a branch and cocked his head.

His friends were astounded that Timmy was so quiet.
They were expecting to come home to a yackety riot.

At last Timmy spoke. He said “I’d like to apologise.
The events of this weekend have opened my eyes
and I guess you could say, they also opened my ears!
So I’m sorry my pals, my friends, my dears!
I’d really like to be a better friend,
so please tell me all about your camping weekend!”

“Well, ok,” said Sally, “it was quite delightful,
although the wolf calls at night can be rather frightful!”

Timmy listened with both ears as they all shared their tales
of the campfires and the marshmallows and the cold ginger ales.
He laughed and asked questions and let them all speak
about the wolf calls and the night stars and the cave and the creek.

He felt a little bit jealous, but it also felt good
to hear about the fun his friends had had in the wood.

And when they’d told their stories, they all felt great
because it’s always fun to share your experiences with a mate.

“We’re going next weekend, to the very same spot,”
said Arnie the Ass, “and we’d like it a lot,
if you packed your backpack and torch and tent
and we all go back, to where we just went.”

I’d love to,” said Timmy, “it sounds fantastic!
And I promise I won’t be little Mr Bombastic!”

From that day on, Timmy’s whole life seemed to improve.
It was like the needle on the record just hit the right groove.
His friends liked him better, his teachers were impressed.
He felt happy and popular and (hashtag) blessed!

And it was fun to hang out with him – everyone concurred -
since the talkative little tit became the bird who heard…

THE END

There once was a cute little pink little piggy.
His surname was Wiglet and his first name was Ziggy.
He lived in a lovely little house, in a very nice road,
with a beautiful garden, and a pool, and a toad!
He had friends and a bike and toys and such,
and his parents loved him very, very much.

He had a brand-new skateboard and a soccer ball too,
books and games and his very own loo!
He had his very own bedroom, with his very own bed
and shoes for his feet, and hats for his head
and a lunchbox to open - every day at 1,
with fruit and a cooldrink and a sandwich (or a bun).

Now you’d think he’d be happy with all that he had,
but no, little Ziggy only saw the bad…

His bike wasn’t new enough – not by a mile!
And his food was so plain that he just couldn’t smile.

He really really didn’t want to go to school,
and the water was too cold in his swimming pool.

The vacation was boring – he wanted to go home.
And the movie was stupid – “I’ve seen Home Alone!”
“I don’t feel like going to the beach!” he’d say,
and: “why won’t the neighbour’s weird kid go away?”

All day long, he’d complain and he’d whine,
because Ziggy was an ungrateful little swine.

One day his parents took him out to the slums
to show him some piggies with very dirty bums.
“But why is that one so thin?” asked Ziggy.
“Well”, said his mom, “there’s no food in that piggy!”

“There’s no mommy to feed him, no butter, no bread…
Who knows when last that little piggy was fed?
He has no lunchbox, no books and no shiny toys.
There are no beach trips or new clothes for some little boys.”

“Why, some little piggies have nothing at all…
No flat screen tv, no soccer ball,
no scooter or skateboard and definitely no bike
(and no rich uncle, like your uncle Mike).
There’s no money for school, so no education.
And do you think these little piggies ever go on vacation?”

Ziggy looked at the slumpiggies and after a while,
He noticed something strange – it was… a smile!
And there was another, and another and more!
Ziggy counted twelve, seventeen, twenty-one, twenty-four!
“But mommy”, he asked, “If everything’s so bad,
why are these piggies so… not very sad?
Why are they smiling and happy and stuff,
when it’s obviously obvious they don’t have enough?”

“Well”, said his mommy, “I think it’s because…
when you don’t have very much, you learn to value what’s yours.
You learn to appreciate everything you’ve got.
Whether it’s old or new, whether it’s perfect or not!”

“That little piggy’s toy is a big round stone.
He’s not complaining about his old-ish iPhone.

And those two old piggies are smiling broadly today,
just because they had a roll in the hay!”

“These piggies appreciate every little thing -
the bright stars at night, a butterfly wing,
an old crust of toast, a puddle of mud,
a sunshiny day spent outside with a bud,
a fresh patch of grass, the scent of a flower…
They’re grateful every second, every minute, and every hour!”

Later that night when Ziggy was in bed,
he couldn’t get the slumpigs out of his head.
He lay there, warm, and snuggled up tight,
and wondered how warm they were tonight.

The next morning at breakfast, as he sipped his tea,
he thought about saying “oh, woe is me!”
But then he wondered if the slumpigs were sitting down to food
and instead he said “thank you, it’s very, very good!”

When it was time for school, he didn’t complain.
He thought “I’m lucky to be able to train my brain!”
And when he opened his lunchbox and rolled his eyes,
Ziggy realised - much to his surprise -
that moaning about this and complaining about that
probably meant he was a bit of a brat…

He decided then and there that enough was enough
and that he would be grateful for all kinds of stuff!
For every new morning and every new night,
for his little piggy tail, for his hearing and sight,
for his toys and tv and toad and pool,
his bike and his bed - and even his school!

He was a very lucky piglet – he understood that now,
and so he made a solemn vow…
He promised his mommy he wouldn’t complain
about the sun or the wind or the snow or the rain
or the shoes on his feet or the food on his plate.

Ziggy had learned to appreciate!

And a funny thing happened from that very day.
He began to see things in a whole new way.

The pool was refreshing – no longer too cold,
and his bike was awesome – didn’t matter how old!

The peanut butter sandwich was actually quite yum.
And that movie was funny – the one he’d thought was dumb.

Everything’s better when you’re grateful, you see.
From your clothes to your food, and even a cup of tea.

A dull day at the beach becomes a wonderful treat.
And that boring apple suddenly tastes quite sweet.

“This vacation’s so fun it must never ever end!”
and the kid down the street… starts to look like a friend.

In fact the whole wide world began to look better to young Ziggy
the day that ungrateful little swine became a thankful little piggy.

THE END

There are nine days left of the “hard lockdown” we’re currently experiencing. After that, who knows? We definitely won’t be attending any festivals for a very long time. (Insert sad face.) We probably won’t be booking flights anywhere for a while. And we’ll most likely be sanitising bedonnered and fistbumping our besties well into the future.

But aren’t we going to be delighted to be able to buy what we want, when we want it? Aren’t we going to be so grateful when we can hug our parents and spend quality time with them again? And aren’t we going to be overjoyed to have friends over for drinks - without fear of jail time or having to ration what’s left of the booze stash?

In other words, we are being given the opportunity to not only learn more about who and what’s important to us, but also to start to actively appreciate those people and things - to the max.

I think that’s my biggest take away from this experience - what I may have been taking for granted. The ocean. The mountains. My folks and friends. The freedom to walk my dogs in the most exquisite places. A steady stream of work and income. A beer at Dunes. My brother in the US, who I don’t speak to nearly enough. Bikram in a stunning yoga studio. Pitching my tent at a music or spiritual festival. Seeing the final four episodes of the latest season of Grey’s Anatomy (it’s OK Shonda, we understand why you had to halt filming.)

I am trying not to lament the lack of these things at the moment, but rather attempting to practice gratitude, and commit to being more aware post-lockdown, so that I do all these things more often, and with my full appreciation.

I didn’t attend a yoga class for months - months, people! And as lockdown hit, I thought “Aaw no, that means I can’t go to yoga, boo hoo, poor me.”

Really, Nikki? Really?

What and who are you missing the most?

What can’t you wait to do? Where can’t you wait to go? Who can’t you wait to hug?

From what I’m seeing on social media, it seems the big question is actually - what can’t you wait to drink?

I am not a big drinker, but how I thought 12 Savanna Lites were going to see me through is beyond me. So I can’t wait for a Savanna Lite… ooooh and a Castle Draught. Not at the same time.

(Actually, maybe at the same time.)

I can’t wait to hang out at my folks’ place and take my dogs up a mountain and drive up the west coast and have some peeps round for a braai and go for sushi and pitch my tent.

I think this has been a time of reflection for many of us, and a chance to reassess who and what we value most in this funny old life.

May we never ever take any of it for granted again.