lovenotfear Thoughts and inspiration for a happier you




Calm yourself (before you harm yourself)


5 simple techniques for reducing anxiety

If you’re someone who gets wrapped up into a tight little ball of nervous anxiety when you’re stressed and you don’t really do anything about it, I have a question…

If there was a way to be able to control that nervous energy and bring everything down a notch or seven, would you use it? Yes?

Good news, guys. There is a way. Several ways, actually. Tools you’ve heard of, read about. Maybe you’ve even tried a couple. But in my experience as a serial befriender and dater of anxious people, you guys seem to shun the very methods that could help the anxiety. It’s not your fault; after all, it’s the opposite of what your body naturally wants to do when you’re in a heightened state of anxiety. So, it’s not easy. But maybe, just maybe, you haven’t given them a proper try? What if something works?

What about now?

Studies have shown that anxiety has severe effects on the body and mind – both short-and long-term. The more serious of these is heart issues, gastrointestinal issues, heart problems like increase risk of heart disease, various illnesses from a lowered immune system, gastrointestinal disorders including irritable bowel syndrome, memory problems and frequent migraines.

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

1. Breathe

If you suffer even just a little bit from anxiety, you’ll know that your breathing can become quite shallow and quick when you feel out of sorts. By learning to control your breath, you can learn to control your anxiety. And if you learn to manage your anxiety – needless to say, you go into the next phase of your life a little bit calmer, able to deal with life’s ups and downs a little easier. Intentional breathing has a calming effect on the nervous system and the mind – it’s almost impossible not to feel better after a series of deep, slow, intentional breaths. There are a variety of methods to try – google and see what resonates with you. Better yet – watch this great TED talk and then find the method that works for you.

2. Meditation

Whether you lie on your bed listening to a guided meditation or try the “just sitting” method, it will help you. You will find that any instruction around meditation starts with deep breathing. (Funny that.) Once you master the art of stillness, you can use it any time to bring your anxiety level down. Any. Time. The major cause of anxiety is worry, and if you learn to “just breathe” and “just sit” and “just be”, you can learn to let go of worry, even if just for a few minutes at a time – at first.

3. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is simply the art of knowing what is happening, as it’s happening, without any judgement. It’s about being present in the moment. How might this help you? As you become more mindful, you can more quickly and easily notice when your anxiety levels go up, and you can then use one of the tools to calm yourself. This involves doing only one thing at a time, and for those who suffer from anxiety, it’s an invaluable way of being. By training your mind to focus on only one thing at a time, you learn to shut down all the incessant chatter in your head. If you’re eating, just eat. Don’t eat while working or while trying to come up with a solution to your problems. If you’re in a meeting, just be in the meeting – don’t start rehearsing what you’re going to say to the person who upset you most recently.

4. Mantras

I am lucky in that anxiety only hits me every now and then, but when I feel it rising in me, I do something about it immediately. If I have time, I will sit and breathe or meditate for a while. If I only have a few minutes to get back to good, I simply take a few deep breaths and I remind myself that everything is under control. I might need to do it a few times over the space of an hour, but the action I take ALWAYS helps. Always. Another mantra I use is NNTP, which of course stands for No Need To Panic. It makes me chuckle and that, friends, is yet another way to reduce your anxiety. Find something to laugh at.

5. Solve a problem

If you really have something causing you severe anxiety, ask yourself: What’s my main problem, really? If the problem is something quite real, and it is within your power to change it, then spend some dedicated time writing, thinking and/or talking about the problem, and find a workable and realistic solution to it. Of course, if it’s on your mind while you’re chasing a deadline or doing your work, then use one of the other tools to calm yourself. Decide right there and then on a time and place that you are going to actively work on a solution – whether for an hour or a morning. Put it in your diary if you have to. Then breathe, say your mantra, be mindful and remind yourself that there is no need to panic - you have set aside time to work on the solution and for now, worrying isn’t going to change anything.

I’m not saying it’s easy, and of course I’m not professing that people with major anxiety disorders should sniff lavender and do their “ohms” and all will be right in the world. But if it’s something that tends to get the better of you and you haven’t yet started intentionally working on your anxiety, why not give these simple (and super cheap) tools a try? You might find it’s a lot easier than you thought.

Most importantly though, it’s a conscious, intentional step in the direction of self-love and self-care. And that’s always a powerful thing. It might seem dramatic to say you could harm yourself, but you know deep down that your anxiety is doing you no good.

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